Posts Tagged ‘funny’

Music in the air

August 27, 2014

This morning Babess was ready to go a little earlier than I was, so I sent her out to get her scooter ready to go to school.
After a short time she came running back in, breathless with excitement.
“Mum! Guess what’s outside?!”
“Um, I saw the neighbours are taking down their old fence,” I said, “I think they’re going to put up a new one.”
“Well, but there’s Something Else!”

I am continually amazed at her ability to enunciate capital letters. It’s a great skill to have. “Goodness me, whatever could it be?” I played along.
“On the driveway, there’s a… Harmonica. Wing!”

I blinked. A what?

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand. What did you say, sweetie?”
“A harmonica wing!”
“A… harmonica?… wing?”
“Yes, a harmonica wing. Like, harmonica butterfly?” C’mon, Mum, stop being dense!

“Oh! A monarch butterfly wing?”
“YES! Come see!”

And so I did. (It was a Red Admiral wing, actually).

© UpsideBackwards 2014.

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Being watched

March 20, 2014

Fainjin proudly showed me a page in one of his exercise books.  The class had been asked to write down things they love.

Fainjin had drawn a big heart, and put his words in and around it.  I saw Lego, dragons, robots, ice cream… no big surprises there!

“What’s this one?” I asked, pointing to where he’d written “Guses”.

“Jesus!” he said.  “And God’s there too,” he pointed.

“Oh, of course, silly me.”

He leant in close and confided, “I had to put those guys in, in case they might get mad or something.”

I was slightly shocked, and amused.  “No, Fainjin, that’s not what happens!”

But he interrupted me, looking over his shoulder, and whispered, “Mum! They’re everywhere!”

Possibly a religious-education failure right there.

Fainjin loves...

Fainjin loves…

© UpsideBackwards 2014.

Legend

November 28, 2013

We have a busy rehearsal and performance schedule coming up this weekend.  And every performer knows, where there are rehearsals there is also lots of waiting around doing not-very-much.

I was talking about preparing my bag for this, with stories, games, and so on to entertain the large group of potentially-bored children.  Fainjin overheard me…

“Mum!  If you’re getting a story for my class, can it be a miff?”

“A miff?”

“Yes!”

“I don’t think I know what that is.  What’s it about?”

“Uh, it’s like… a legend…”

“Oh! A myth!”

“Yes Mum!  M-Y-P-H.  Myph.  Like a legend.”

I spelt myth out for him and had him repeat it.  Then breakfast conversation moved on and he and Pearl started an argument about Medusa, the Minotaur, and the Gorgons.

Some mornings I really feel like I need a second cup of tea.

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

Tablets

October 16, 2013

Another breakfast conversation with Fainjin – they seem to be my main source of blog fodder at the moment!

I’d been talking about some medicine with Pearl, and used the word “tablet”.  About five minutes later, Fainjin said, “Mum, I’m confused about tablets.”

“Confused?  Why?”

He thought for a bit.  “Well, they can be different things.”

I saw what he was getting at.  “Do you mean like tablets that are medicine and tablets that are computers?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s just using the same word to mean two different things.  It’s a little bit confusing, but we do it in the English language all the time.  I wouldn’t worry too much.”

He considered that, then said, “OK”.  I was grateful he didn’t ask for another example, because I didn’t have one ready despite my assertion.  Feel free to leave a list of your favourites in the comments.

Then a few minutes later, he mused, “And some tablets are baby frogs.”

Pearl and I looked at him, and laughed.  “OK Fainjin, now you are confused!”

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

Bleaching the baddies

June 22, 2013

Another Saturday afternoon, another game of “What can I doooo?” at our house.

The Dad suggested that Fainjin clean the toilet, and clearly the novelty hasn’t worn off because he enthusiastically agreed – and Babess asked to clean the basin too.  We reminded them to change into old clothes.

Last week Fainjin forgot, and cleaned the toilet in regular weekend clothes – a dark blue t-shirt and dark blue shorts.  Of course he got bleach on them, and they both now sport rusty-red stripes.  It’s not a huge deal, but it would be nice to have some clothes without bleach damage, hence the old-clothes reminder.

Fainjin came out wearing an oldish t-shirt and his Superman shorts.  They’re not new, but I asked whether he was really ok with cleaning in them.  He paused for thought.

“Yeah, Mum, if you say it’s ok, because if the bleach gets on them, they will get red stripes and it will look like blood, like Superman killed some bad guys and that would be really cool?”  he looked at me with his face full of hope.

How could I deny him?

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

A heartfelt wish for Mothers’ Day

May 1, 2013

At the school holiday programme today – which Pearl and Fainjin most thoroughly enjoyed – they were encouraged to make gifts and cards for Mothers’ Day.  Fainjin made me some lovely floral-and-lots-of-things badges, and this utterly priceless card.

Fainjin  Mum

Fainjin”hearts” Mum

I love the kitten saying “Mewu”.  There’s a dog in a kennel (I think) saying “Aooo”, a picture of me saying “Me”, and Fainjin saying “Roar”.  But the inside of the card is the best bit.

Mum can you stop telling me to do jobs from Fainjin

Mum can you stop telling me to do jobs from Fainjin

I love you so much, please stop making me do housework!

I am keeping this card in our box of special things to keep for 21st birthdays.  Oh, and guess what we’re doing tomorrow?  Jobs.

 

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

 

Golf balls

April 24, 2013

We’re just home from a few days away.  It is bliss to be back in our own place and our own beds!  But of course it was lovely to get away for a little while too.  We had fun exploring a new (to the children) city and seeing the sights.

By yesterday afternoon Babess was tired beyond reason, so I kept her at the motel with me and sent The Dad out with the older two to have an adventure without us.  Babess snuggled on the couch under a blanket – I hoped she’d drop off, but she didn’t, so we watched a cartoon movie together and I knitted another pattern repeat in my shawl.  It was lovely and restful and we both appreciated the chance to chill out a bit.

Eventually The Dad returned with Pearl and Fainjin, and they were fizzing.  They’d been to play minigolf.  Pearl showed me the scorecard with a measure of chagrin.  Her score was highest, Fainjin a few shots less, and The Dad had beaten them both by over 30.  I pointed out that she had got best value for money, having actually played more golf than anyone else.  She liked that way of looking at it.  I didn’t tell her that I’d come up with it to justify my own golf scores whenever I play.

Fainjin came bouncing in next to tell us all about it.  “We played minigolf!  It was awesome!  There were lots of testicles and…”

“Hang on Fainjin, what did you say?”

“We played minigolf!  It was awesome!  There were lots of testicles and you had to…”

“Wait!  Did you say testicles?  Lots of testicles?” I was smothering gales of laughter and trying to figure out what he had meant to say.

He didn’t notice I was laughing.

“Yeah, lots of testicles!  It was really cool!”

“Ummmmm, do you mean… obstacles?”

“Yeah!  Testicles!”

I made him repeat the word “obstacles” after me a few times.  Life is full of obstacles.  Luckily, it’s also full of comedy.

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

Who’s there?

March 21, 2013

Babess has discovered the delights of the knock-knock joke.  This afternoon in the car she was practising on Fainjin.

B: “Knock knock!”

F: “Who’s there?”

B: “Boo!”

F (has heard this many times before but goes along with it): “Boo who?”

B: “Ahhh, don’t cry Fainjin, it’s only me! Ahahahaha!”

F: “Yep, right. My turn.  Knock knock!”

B: …

F: “Knock knock!”

B: …

F, getting frustrated: “Knock knock!”

B: “There’s no-one there, Fainjin, nobody’s home.”

Little sister wins.  Again.

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

Something beginning with b

March 10, 2013

We had a longish drive home, and the children were playing I Spy.  They’d all had several turns, and Pearl said, “I spy with my little eye, something beginning with S”.

Fainjin and Babess took several guesses.  “Nope!” said Pearl.  “I’ll give you a hint, it’s inside the car.”

They each took several more guesses.  After a loooong time, Pearl smugly revealed, “Ha! I was tricking you!  It’s not inside the car!  Guess again.”

“Pearl?” Babess said wearily.  “When you see this bored look on my face, it means: I’m bored.”

Game, set and match to baby sister.

© UpsideBackwards 2013.

The end of nap time

February 1, 2013

We visited a farm/forest park today, and had a wonderful time.  I hope to have a longer post on it with photos tomorrow.  But for now, a quick story:

As we walked along one path through the trees, we heard a rooster.  “What’s that?!” Babess seemed quite shocked.  “It’s a rooster,” I told her, and managed to point it out hiding in the bushes.

“Did it say cock-a-doodle-doo?” she asked in a puzzled voice.

“Yes he did,” I agreed, wondering what was so mysterious to her.

“But why did he do that when everyone’s already awake?”

Ahhhhh.  I tried to tell her that roosters can crow at any time, but she gave me a witheringly disbelieving look.  After all, in all her story books, roosters only crow at daybreak.

“Perhaps someone’s just finished their naptime then?” I suggested, and she agreed that that must be it.

© UpsideBackwards 2013.


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